Booyow!
Got some new digs! Its like I moved from a 300 sq ft. one-bedroom apartment to a 350 sq ft. 2-bedroom apartment!
Is life too good for you? Get your regular suck here folks. I’ll do my best to ruin it for you.
Cheerio!
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Ah Sunday morning! No better way to start a fresh Sunday than with some fucking losing.
Losing friends, losing in competition, you name it. Losing SUCKS deep down in your gut and makes you want to
FUCK! SHIT! BITHFACE!
No sense to be made here. Just expressing frustration over some recent losses.
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Fucking Apple. Did it again.
I’m not gonna bore anyone with the details about their upcoming 4.0 release, but the fact that some of the functionality (most importantly, multitasking) will not work for 3g phones sucks gorilla sack!
This is EXACTLY the type of bullshit that practically forces someone to jailbreak their phone. I fail to believe its not possible on the 3g phone b/c my jailbroken 3g phone has been multitasking for months now with good battery performance (primarily audio streaming). Granted it may not have been to Apple’s standard, but you know what? 3g users would’ve gladly accepted limited multitasking over NO multitasking.
Piss on Apple man. They were already on my list, but this takes the cake. As soon as the opportunity presents itself, this bullshit phone is getting replaced by a non-Apple phone.
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I’m a good person. I have a good soul. I’m not the type to make fun of what people can afford to drive.
However…
If you have, what rich types call, “expendable income”… and you willingly choose to do this type of shit to your car (like this guy), all bets are off.
Things that are wrong with this car:
shitty ass wing…
shitty ass body kit…
shitty ass exhaust…
shitty ass light thingy between the brake lights…
SHITTY ASS WING!
SHITTY ASS WING!
SHITTY ASS WING!
Know what could make this car any shittier???
NOTHING!
That’s right, there’s nothing more you could do to further en-shitenfy this car.
My god in heaven, is that wing big enough??? What the FUCK was he thinking?
“Uh, yeah, I, uh, want a futuristic coffee table on mah shit!”
That car cannot go 300+ mph… which is the minimum speed he would have to go in order for that wing to actually be functional. Top speed on that shitbox has got to be 92mph. It might go faster, but the wing and the body shit (not kit) weigh it down.
How many of these shit-mobiles do you see every week? Unless you live in the country, I’ll bet you see a few dozen on a weekly basis. When you see one of these, snap a picture of it and send it to me. I will post your shit with awesome commentary, unless you provide your own…
…but don’t, its my blog.
See, I told you I’m a good person. 
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Houses suck…
Cars suck…
Money suck… (plural, not singular)
…
When you don’t have it now, amirite?
Think about it. When you “have”, shit is great, but when you don’t, these things SUCK because they won’t just fucking come to you. I dunno, maybe I’m better off learning to follow the ways of Buddha and just not giving a fuck about about “worldly” things, right?
Fuck that.
Being the externally motivated mothafucker that I am, that bullshit doesn’t work. Sure I could probably learn to curb the desire for “things”, but its not natural. Its natural for humans to “want” shit. Think about it… you’ve “wanted” something ever since you were a stupid baby.
Its who we are/become that manages how we deal with that desire.
If you are so moved, that you “want” to send me “monies” (plural, not singular) in exchange for more existential wisdom, contact me here. Remember, your money will only burden you in this life. Let me carry it for you.
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Hello? Anyone out there?
Man, its almost like I suck, or something weird like that… and that’s highly likely if we’re judging based on the name of this bliggety blog.
I’m still alive though. I’ve been busy with some shit so complicated, it would enfuckulate your brain if I tried to explain it. So, for health reasons, I’ll give no reason for my absence.
Just know that I guarantee more content, More criticisms, and MORE SUCK! 2010 is gonna be a big year for This Crap. My goal is to make you think of me when you think of crap.
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So its December, which must mean that its suck-time for my Vikes. We’ve lost 2 out of 3 so far, and both losses were in horrifically-embarrassing fashion.
Yeah, we’ll be in the playoffs, but right now, I don’t feel too good about our chances. That’s the thing about the NFL though. One loss and the sky is falling. One win and things are back to normal. Its kinda screwy like that, and the way it plays with your emotions is the worst part.
If anyone wants to make me feel better, I accept PayPal. I ain’t bullshittin’.
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Of course I didn’t forget about the blog. Its just that…
well…
uh…
I don’t have too much to complain about right now???
I know, it makes about as much sense as the picture above right?
For anyone that knows me, I’m a complainin’ motha fucka! I know it! Its ok. I’m at peace with that.
And actually, the outcome of the Vikings game last Sunday night sucked yak balls, and the injury to EJ Henderson was horrible, but I’m not gonna spend too much time whining about that here. I mean, what do you think I do, spend all day thinking of shit to post on this suck ass blog?
So anywho, suck on this. You stay classy Jersey.
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Well, I don’t know quite what to say about this one.
I’m not a linguologist, but there’s a word that describes a team that has everything going in their favor but fails to deliver the knockout blow…
…CHOKERS.
You don’t even have to follow football to know what choking is.
The Redskins had the undefeated Saints on the ropes LATE in the 4th quarter and choked the game away in unbelievable fashion. I’m not gonna go into details about why I need the Saints to lose. Any up-to-date NFL fan knows the sitch.
I don’t even wanna begin to think about what Skins fans are feeling right about now. Their season was in the shitter anyway so they’re probably all passed out drunk right now. That’s right babies, happy juice make pain go bye bye.
